A Brief Dispatch from Uncle Crumbles:
“Salad, my friends, is too often treated as a punishment. A plate of penance for past indulgence. But I, Uncle Crumbles, reject such culinary self-flagellation. A salad should sing — a symphony of sweet, salty, crunchy, and bold. Thus I present the Cran-Maple Crunch Feta Feast, an ode to flavor balance and unapologetic joy. The secret? My Cran-Maple Crunch granola — the salad topping no one saw coming, yet now cannot live without.” – U.C.
Ingredients
For the Salad:
- 4 cups mixed greens (spinach, arugula, or whatever's chilling in your fridge)
- 1/2 cup crumbled feta cheese
- 1 crisp apple, thinly sliced
- 1/3 cup dried cranberries
- 1/2 cup Cran-Maple Crunch granola
- 1/4 cup chopped pecans or walnuts (if you're feeling extra chaotic)
For the Maple Dijon Dressing:
- 3 tbsp olive oil
- 1 tbsp apple cider vinegar
- 1 tbsp pure maple syrup
- 1 tsp Dijon mustard
- A pinch of salt and a few grinds of black pepper
Directions
1. Assemble the Salad:
Spread the greens across a large serving bowl like the verdant plains of destiny. Add the apple slices, cranberries, feta, and nuts. Now comes the crescendo: scatter the Cran-Maple Crunch granola over the top. Not a sprinkle — a statement. This, dear reader, is how texture triumphs.
2. Make the Dressing:
In a small jar or bowl, whisk together olive oil, vinegar, maple syrup, Dijon, salt, and pepper. Shake until emulsified (or until your forearm feels heroic). Taste and adjust until it makes your eyebrows raise approvingly.
3. Bring It All Together:
Drizzle the dressing over your assembled masterpiece. Toss gently, as one would handle a sleeping cat. Serve immediately and bask in the knowing silence of people realizing they’ve been eating underdressed salads their entire lives.
A Brief Digression on Granola in Salads:
Some scoff at the notion. "Granola? In a salad?" they cry, clutching their croutons like relics. But let me tell you — granola, especially the Cran-Maple Crunch granola, provides a sweetness that flatters greens, a crunch that humbles seeds, and a maple undertone that persuades feta to behave. It turns salad from side dish to centerpiece. Civilization was built on innovations like this.
Serve this salad as a main course for lunch or as the dazzling opener to a feast. Either way, prepare for compliments, confusion, and conversions to the Crumbles enlightenment.
